Below are the 20 most recent journal entries recorded in spookshowqueen's LiveJournal:

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Monday, June 9th, 2008
11:16 pm	<333 I was just complaining to that boy about how much time I spent outside today and still got No color. He responded with, "You don't tan because God knows how hot you are pale. He's seen you're white ass and he likes it." Oh man. Perfect. The most perfect thing a boy could ever say. <333 (1 Comment |Comment on this)
Sunday, June 8th, 2008
7:04 pm	I'm done. I got drunk last night. I made a drunken spectacle of myself once again. I fell off a porch, wrecked my ribs and back. I said a bunch of things I shouldn't have. I didn't drink much, I don't know what is going on. I'm done drinking for a while until I can figure what keeps happening. Current Mood: disappointed (Comment on this)
Friday, May 23rd, 2008
4:24 am	I shoot to thrill, from the hips... Don't let the grown up delusion fool you. It's all an illusion. I'm the same girl I have always been. I like boys with pretty eyes and a buzz cut. I'm a sucker for sleeve of tattoos. When I see something I want, I must have it. I thought I was someone new. I thought I was a girl who had finally settled down. Let me give you a heads up kids, people don't change. We never change. Please make way for "high school" Ronni, shes apparently come back for a visit. Current Mood: naughty (1 Comment |Comment on this)
Sunday, May 18th, 2008
11:51 pm	He's hiding something. I feel it. (Comment on this)
Tuesday, May 13th, 2008
8:24 pm	Only different by kick snares and names. I had a great weekend at home. I came home to Salem and headed straight to the cape to surprise Susan and see Liz. The hardest part of going to the Cape is leaving. I love it there, it settles my soul. No matter how screwed up things are in my life at that moment, the cold cape air puts everything back in place. I stopped in Boston on the way home to see that boy. We made sammiches and watched the first season of Lost. I really liked Lost. We just snuggled in bed and then we went and got ice cream. I like him. I like him a lot. I like waking up next to his beautiful green/blue eyes. I like the way he looks in just his jeans, sitting on the couch. I like the way he brushes he hair out of my face and how he laughs at my jokes. I hope this works. I hope he likes me as much as I like him. <333333 Current Mood: contemplative (Comment on this)
Friday, May 9th, 2008
1:48 am	Fuck. Fuck. Fuck. I want this to fucking work. I want to not get upset by kyle. I want to be over this and ready for something new. I want HIM to be interested. FUUUCK. (Comment on this)
Monday, May 5th, 2008
12:37 am	what the fuck? I just woke up out of a dead sleep. I was scared and shaking and completely unaware why. I think it was a panic attack. I have no job and I think I'm scared. fuck. My heart is still going a mile a minute. (Comment on this)
Friday, May 2nd, 2008
9:45 pm	I'm going to miss liz madden. I dont want her to leave. Drunkness, art time, sharing dessert....*tears* (Comment on this)
Saturday, April 26th, 2008
10:56 pm	I am worth it. I am beautiful. I am talented and full of promise. I have so much love to give. I deserved to be chased. I'm a fucking catch. I will find someone who loves me for me and wants to be with me because they relieze that I'm a supportive, loving, passionate, beautiful and trusting person. Current Mood: completely aware (Comment on this)
Friday, April 25th, 2008
9:07 pm	I just want one person in my life to come through like they say they will. Thats all I want. I'm so sick of being let down. I'm tired. I'm really tired of all of this. Current Mood: crushed (Comment on this)
2:51 pm	The question now is, will he show? We'll see and if he does, can I NOT act like a total girl? I'm wicked lame. Current Mood: crazy (Comment on this)
Thursday, April 17th, 2008
1:59 am	what am I doing? I stay up until 4 talking to him online. I think about him at work. I wait for him online just to talk for a couple minutes. I wonder when I'm going to see him again. He's handsome, smart and cultured. He's shaped beautifully and he's got the most radiant eyes I've ever seen. I'm a fucking 15 year old girl all over again. I'm smitten. FUCKING SMITTEN. I wanted to take time, get my head together. I can't get my head together with him in it. What am I going to do? This is crazy. I can't remember the last time I had a crush like this. Current Mood: enthralled (Comment on this)
Sunday, March 23rd, 2008
11:46 pm	Long time...noo see It's been a while. Kyle and I are over now and I'm living in the apartment we picked out together. I wish i could say I missed him more, but the truth is that it was time. Our paths are going to different ways and we just couldn't fight it anymore. It was for the best. I think I'm going to take some time to just heal up and get my head back in the game. The single life just isn't the same as it was when I was 18. How quickly we grow and change. Current Mood: blank (2 Comments |Comment on this)
Thursday, November 30th, 2006
4:00 am	everythings back to normal. Kyle and I are back together. We booked our flights today to go to Oklahoma. He's going to meet my parents. (Comment on this)
Thursday, September 21st, 2006
1:10 am	single. (2 Comments |Comment on this)
Monday, July 17th, 2006
11:12 pm	Happy birthday to me. Today I turned 19. It was pretty sweet. (1 Comment |Comment on this)
Thursday, July 6th, 2006
10:15 pm	Can I go back to school yet? (3 Comments |Comment on this)
Monday, July 3rd, 2006
10:01 pm	The truth is... one day I'll move away and my mother will realize how hard working and helpful I really was. Maybe she'll realize how much I went out of my way for her. Until the day comes, she'll continue to think that I don't realize "how good I have it" and how much I don't appreciate "everything shes done for me." I wish she knew, I really do. For years I've looked up to her. She's strong, independent, funny and hardworking. If she wants something bad enough, she will find a way to get it. These are all qualities I strive to have, because I admire them so much in my mom. it's hard though, other days shes impossible. The slightest thing will set her off and the rest of the day I spend walking on eggshells to avoid an argument or huge blowout the ends in us not speaking for a few hours. Sometimes I think she pushes me away because she wants me to leave and some days I think she blames me for where we are today. That may not be true, but it's hard for me to believe it's not. I love my mother, but sometimes she makes it hard for me to want to stick around. Current Mood: crushed (2 Comments |Comment on this)
Sunday, June 4th, 2006
9:49 pm	Love is... cold showers together warm blankets camping chairs Tiger Woods 2004 kisses while I'm sleeping Bucky's Burritos Current Mood: loved (Comment on this)
Thursday, June 1st, 2006
9:41 pm	I am lucky to have... A wonderful, understanding and handsome boyfriend Amazing friends that I can go almost a year with out seeing, but it feels as though we've never missed a second Tickets to Oklahoma A layover in Atlanta, Georgia. My FAVORITE airport EVER! (I really mean it though) Lower car insurence with better coverage Things are well. I'm carless until I can get tires on the Bon ala Mode and get her inspected. I would still LOVE to see people. So call a bitch up. (Comment on this)